Crossings
Well we had our first service today. (sigh) Its been a long time coming for some people and it was good to finally start meeting and get the ball rolling so to speak. Everything went really good with set-up and the service went great and God was definitely blessing everything that happened today.
So I just got back from about a 2 hour escapade of driving around to all the Knoxville Super Wal-Mart's with Bill trying to find a video camera. We finally found it at the last stop of the evening, which happened to be at 11:45 pm. But it was a good trip and well worth it and as always. . .good conversation, something I needed.
So I've been feeling like this large weight has been on my back as of lately with trying to figure out this job situation and really this life situation and where Court and I are supposed to be, whether thats here in Knoxville or maybe California or who knows where. And Bill and I just talked a little bit about that this evening. You know, sometimes I just wish things weren't so hard sometimes. And thats what Bill and I were talking a little about tonight, he's been here in this situation and understands it and its not the easiest position in the world to be at or the easiest thing in the world to do. But there has always been this scripture that has always challenged me in my life and its found in Matthew 7:13-14. "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." These two verses have never failed to pop up in my life when times are getting rough and things aren't going like I had planned them to, but they always seem to show up at these times to challenge me.
Its not so much saying that its hard to become a Christian, but rather its hard to live as Christ lived and to live as Christ calls us to live and few decide to take that road. But Im not even sure if Im close to even being on that road or if I've ever been on that road, or maybe Im walking on that road right now. I dont know.
Its hard path at times to be upon and not the most popular path, but I really do believe with everything in me that its the only true and right path to be upon. And aren't we all searching for life anyway? And we're told that Christ has come to bring us life and to have it to its fullest, and then we're told to enter through the narrow gate which leads to life, which is Christ. So if Christ is what brings us life and to get to Christ, you must enter the narrow gate and walk along the narrow road, then shouldn't we do that? What else is there for us to do?
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6 comments:
I know the dust of this particular musing quite well. The first few jobs I had out of college, and out of law school, I wore myself out trying to connect the dots between my occupation and what I perceived as, for lack of a better term, my Purpose. A verse that has fed me repeatedly as I have wrestled over the years is Isaiah 30:21. And I've see how He's given me the freedom to make choices (even some that I later regretted or would have made differently) and blessed me in each of them. There was great joy in the realization that what felt like an overwhelming decision was an overwhelming freedom b/c I couldn't fatally screw it up. Beyond choosing Jesus, there wasn't one choice I had to make that would make or break me, my marriage, career, etc. You've already chosen wisely, Tim. Now choose joyfully!
peace be with you,
Kevin
aey, if bill was tryin to discourage our plans for cali, im not havin it.. naw juss playin.. good talkin to u last week.. take er easy..
Kevin, thanks for the words of encouragement . . I needed to hear them. . thank you.
yes, vaka...i was. so deal with it.
so are you going to start updating once you live in another state?
hey tim, I don't know you, but I'm a friend of Bill's so that's how I found your blog.
I know you've already made your decision. I'm sure you had to wrestle with it quite a bit. I remember when I was an intern at a church, I used to get advice from this older guy on a lot of decisions in my life. One thing he said to me that I will never, ever forget is this: when faced with a tough decision that could go either way, always go with the one you are most scared of. If nothing else, then just to show God you would do it for him. I wish I could say I always adhered to this advice. I haven't. But the times that I have, I have never regretted it. It seems God has always seen fit to 'reward' me for giving up my desires for His. Good luck on your next adventure.
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